So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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