at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
