you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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