capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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