i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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