i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
