Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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