If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
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