he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
So squirting runs in the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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