Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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