hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
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