He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
