I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize