You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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