I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize