He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
