the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
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i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize