The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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