He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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