I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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