If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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