We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
