what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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