Screwed.edu
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
