The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
