All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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