I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Your dad touched me again.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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