Dual....:-)
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
