I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Randomize
