I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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