Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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