who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
