If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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