She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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