we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
