I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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