Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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