I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
