I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
jump out the window naked night went bad
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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