I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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