It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize