I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
