i jhust puked up my retainher.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize