I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
