went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
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Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
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I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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