Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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