I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
