she looked like the bat from fern gully.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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