i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
