Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.